Maybe you fear you will be rejected or the other person will retaliate and hurt you?
As children, we are told it is wrong to get angry, but if we have healthy self-respect we will of course feel angry sometimes. It is an impossible expectation to get through life without feeling angry and if we think it is wrong to feel it we will feel a failure every time we succumb to it.
Unexpressed anger can lead to anxiety, depression and unexplained physical symptoms, but the energy generated by anger used wisely can motivate and energise us to make positive changes in our life.
How I Can Help
Learn to recognise external triggers like hunger, tiredness or being ignored, also be aware of the all too familiar physical tensions building up in the body before an outburst. You may think you suddenly see red but in truth things have been building up for a while before that sudden explosion.
We each have the right to express our feelings though doing so when it is unfamiliar may be difficult. It is much better to let our anger out bit by bit than to sit on it fuming silently till we have an unexpected outburst of rage. In close relationships learning to express our anger allows us to be seen and accepted for who we really are, genuine grievances can be addressed and problems solved by discussion.
Therapy can be very helpful in working with anger and there are techniques that can be learned that will make a big difference to how you respond. Working through the way you feel with a professional can help. If you would like to make changes don't hesitate to get in touch with me, by calling on 07786 483156